O sing a song of Cap’n Crunch, the sugar sweet cereal that’s fun to munch
It’s great for breakfast or even lunch, no amount of milk will make it lose its crunch
(no amount of milk will make it lose its crunch)
(Dog howls)
So all ashore that’s going ashore
Get Cap’n Crunch at your grocery store
The efficacy of the efforts can be demonstrated by the character’s (and cereal’s) longevity. Fifty years after his introduction, Cap’n Crunch shows no sign of slowing, even scoring an article about him (thanks to some clever marketing) in the Wall Street Journal.
“According to his official biography, Cap'n Crunch, whose full name is Horatio Magellan Crunch, was born on Crunch Island in the Sea of Milk – "a magical place with talking trees, crazy creatures and a whole mountain (Mt. Crunchmore) made out of Cap'n Crunch cereal." It remains unclear if Crunch Island is part of the United States.”
Nissenbaum, Dion. “U.S. Navy: No Record of Cap'n Crunch Service.” Wall Street Journal, June 20, 2013.
Setting aside the obvious negative health effects of feeding children pure sugar, there’s also the mental impact of developing a close bond with these cartoon mascots.
Shocking and hilarious, if somewhat dark, was the mid-90s send up of cereal box mascots in “The Cereal Killings,” a comic book series by artist/writer James Sturm and published by Fantagraphics Books. These comics showed the brand identity underbelly.
“The Cereal Killings” has never been reprinted. You can hunt down individual copies or write Fantagraphics Books and tell them it’s time to collect the series into one volume.